No, you can't get rid of me that easily. I'm doing lead-ins to each Part, in addition to the main intro. =) I'll also occasionally butt in with personal opinions and explanations to the really tough-to-follow bits. And yes, I'll always use this color blue.
Anyway, here we have our opening -- a young girl named Kelly finds that adventures are, in the immortal words of Bilbo Baggins, "nasty disturbing uncomfortable things" that "make you late for dinner!"
Guys, I'm gonna start a story, but someone writes Act 2, then someone else Act 3, and so on.
PS: This isn't a Sonic story.
Kelly was a girl who lived in a faraway land. She was bored a lot, so she decided to go on an adventure, when she saw...
- Kate
PPS: We did this in another club; it was really funny.
...a white rabbit! "Oh dear, oh dear, I shall be late!" it said. For some reason, Alice...er, Kelly...didn't think this unusual at all, but then it pulled a watch from its waistcoat pocket. Now, Kelly had never seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat pocket nor a watch to pull out of it.
Then...
- X (Who just read Alice's Adventures in Wonderland)
...she was beamed up to an alien spaceship. The aliens warped her to another dimension where...
- A.N.T. 100
...a big red cat flew out of the sky.
"Reegal!" it said.
Then a Chihuahua followed.
"Who are you?" Kelly asked.
"I'm Ren. Meet my friend Stimpy. He's an eediot!"
Just then...
- Hedgehog X
..."I'm not Stimpy," replied the cat, grinning ear-to-ear.
"Oh, dear," said Kelly. "I want to leave here! Which way should I go?"
"Where do you want to go?" asked the cat.
"It doesn't matter where," Kelly replied.
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go," the cat said simply.
"What's that way?" asked Kelly, pointing in a random direction.
"That way is the home of the March Hare," the cat replied. "The other way leads to the Mad Hatter."
"Who should I see?" Kelly asked.
"It doesn't really matter," the cat replied, "they're both mad. Everyone here is. I'm mad. You're mad."
"Why do you think you're mad?" Kelly asked.
"Well, a dog is not mad, is it?" the cat asked. Quickly it added, "I mean, other than Ren over there."
"Well...no," was the reply.
"Well, dogs growl when they're angry and wag their tails when they're happy; whereas I growl when I'm happy and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore, I'm mad."
"I call it purring, not growling," Kelly said.
"Call it what you want," the cat said.
"Isn't it a bit presumptuous assuming I'm mad, though?" Kelly asked.
"You must be mad," the cat said, "otherwise you wouldn't be here!" Then it began disappearing, starting with the tail and vanishing more and more until only the grin remained, and at last that was gone, too.
"I've often seen a cat without a grin," Kelly said, "but a grin without a cat?" Then, she realized Ren had wandered off, being bored of the conversation. Suddenly...
- X
...Kelly fell through a door to Christmas town and met Jack Skellington...
- Kate (Yes, I have The Nightmare before Christmas. I've seen it 10 times!)
...who threw her back out, and into a dimension where Sega rules everything.
"Where am I?" she asked.
"Video Games Bulletin Board," came a computer-like reply.
All of a sudden, out of nowhere...
Yakko, Wakko, and Dot appear, then...
- Kate
...8 figures on rollerblades crash into each other. Kelly makes them out to be a hedgehog, a robot, a superhero, a cowboy, a weird secret-service-type-or-maybe-not guy, a monkey-creature, a guy in a green cloak, and a plain 11-year-old kid.
"Almost got the hang of it!" the kid said.
The monkey-creature groaned, "Remind me to shoot your aunt!"
and...
- Hedgehog X
And then, a raptor gobbled her up, and then she had to wait a while to get out, but then...
(True, I do have Jurassic Park.) B-)
...all six of the Power Rangers called all their Zords together and squashed her flat, but...
(It's amazing if you don't figure out I'm a Power Ranger fan)
- CJ Supreme
...then she saw she was in Narnia...
- Kate (Yes I'm reading the Narnia chronicles)
(Hmm...Is this were Aslan enters?)
...then an elf appeared out of thin air in a burst of multi-colored smoke.
"Quagmire thinks that Kelly's in trouble, the danger comes from a pile of rubble!"
"I've gone deaf!" the hedgehog shouted.
- Hedgehog X
Kelly looks around as a big, gold lion appears with Jill and Eustace.
I finished The Silver Chair.
- Kate
"Hullo, what's this?" asks Eustace in his annoying English accent.
"Why, it's a miracle!" Jill says in hers. "I think it's the end of Thad writing about Alice in Wonderland!"
"You are guilty of the sin of jealousy, my children," Aslan said, "you really wanted to come in instead of giving Alice her turn. No big deal though."
Kelly just scratches her head.
Then, with a loud "You eediot!", Ren returns.
- X
"Hold it!" the boy said. Everything freezes. "Reality check!"
The rollerblades sparkle and come off the boy. Then the 7 other bladers merge into one, and the hedgehog is left stranded. In a bright flash of light, he changes into the boy, who walks up to Kelly.
"This is not real. The events happening are reflections of your friends, interests, and traits."
"What does it all mean?" Kelly asks.
"It means," the boy slaps her in the face, and she hears faintly, "Wake up!"
Kelly pops up on a beautiful Sunday morning. But something's not right...
- Hedgehog X
...she is in the castle of the evil witch Jadis!
(The Magician's Nephew)
- Kate
Not just The Magician's Nephew! Jadis was the White Witch in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, as well as the Serpent in The Silver Chair! She indignantly points this out.
"Uhhhh...sorry," Kelly says.
- X
Did you read them, X???????
Jadis hurls Kelly into a land called Middle-Earth.
- Kate
Yes, I read them...
On Middle-Earth, there are loser scumbags called Bashers who are assisting Sauron. Kelly excludes them.
- X
A hedgehog came running by. "Are you out of place, too?" he asked.
Kelly recognized him. He was the hedgehog from her dream. "Yes!" she said.
"My name is Hedgehog X. My sister is weirding out, using her powers of Chaos to throw us all into unknown dimensions."
"How do we stop her?" Kelly asked.
"This is not like her," Hedgehog X said. "Me and my friends came to the conclusion that she is under some kind of spell."
"Your friends?" she asked.
The others that merged with the hedgehog in her dream stepped out.
"Meet the Ego-Trip Patrol," HX said.
- Hedgehog X
Then the world ended!...
- A.N.T. 100 (who thinks this story has gone WaCkO!)
Kelly woke up on yet another planet with her newfound friends. It was all pastel colors, and as she explored it, she heard a strange music playing. Not far off in the distance, she heard a crack and someone yelling...
"You eeediot!"
- Hedgehog X
...and Ren came by, banging Stimpy on the head with a copy of Robin Hoëk.
- Kate
"But Ren..." Stimpy said.
"Shut up you fool!" Ren said. "You haveen't been able to say a seengle funny line seence John Kreecfalusi was fired because he couldn't produce our cartoons fast eenough!"
"Yeah, heheheh," says a voice, "and I haven't been able to scream about fire ever since that kid burned his house down! This sux! Heheheheh!"
- X
"I see a pattern!" Kelly exclaimed.
The Ego-trip team looked at her.
"On Earth, all these characters we're seeing now are fictional. I've been on Middle-Earth, Wonderland, and Narnia, which are lands from popular fantasy books!"
"So we're being jumped in dream worlds!" a guy in a white jumpsuit yelled. Kelly could see he was the Secret Service-type guy from her dream, 'cause he had the same eagle insignia.
"Then get ready for our chance to stop your sister, Hedgehog X," the normal boy said, "'cause Sonic the Hedgehog is on in 5 minutes..."
- Hedgehog X
Created 04.03.25